Doom Scroll: Wax-Sealed Curse Scroll, a Halloween Prank for Someone You Don't Like

Buy 3 or more, $20 each. Discount applies automatically in your cart.

Ships in 2–3 business days · Ground shipping, calculated at checkout
🎃 Halloween: order by Wednesday, October 21, 2026.

Someone out there has it coming.

The coworker who microwaves fish. The neighbor with the leaf blower at 7 a.m. The ex. You know who they are. Send them a Doom Scroll.

People have been cursing each other in writing for thousands of years, on clay, on lead, and in the margins of monastery books. Every Doom Scroll curse is written in the style of a real historical cursing tradition, then rolled and sealed in black wax. It arrives sealed, so they have to break the seal themselves to read it. And every curse is about what happens to the one who breaks the seal.

Choose your curse

1. The Name-Curse: Ancient Mesopotamian. Mesopotamian kings ended their inscriptions with curses on anyone who defaced them. This one opens: "The seal has been broken by a living hand."
2. The Giving-Over: Roman Curse Tablet. Romans scratched curses onto thin sheets of lead, rolled them up, and handed their enemies over to the powers below. "I give to those beneath the earth the hand that broke this seal."
3. Anathema: Medieval Monastic. Medieval scribes guarded their books with curses on thieves, and the Church's gravest sentence was anathema. "Let him be ANATHEMA."
4. The Thorn-Wife's Curse: English Folk. A village curse full of household omens: spoons, shoes, sour milk, and a woman humming outside. It opens: "You meddling fool."
5. The 1893 Letter: Victorian Found Letter. In the manner of a Victorian ghost story: a letter from the scroll's last unlucky owner, and the footsteps that came one pace closer every night.

How to order

1. Pick a curse (one of the five above). It's written out in full on a sheet of handmade, antique-look cotton paper with deckled edges.
2. Pick a seal: Grim Reaper, Raven, Demon, Skull & Raven, or Witch's Potion, all in black wax.
3. Pick their pronouns (for the Name-Curse, the Giving-Over and Anathema only): him, her, or them. The Thorn-Wife's Curse and the 1893 Letter speak directly to "you", so no choice is needed.

Every scroll is anonymous. No names are written on it. The curse falls on whoever breaks the seal.

What to expect

• Each scroll is made to order and finished by hand: written, rolled, and sealed in real wax. Processing takes 2–3 business days, then it ships by ground.
• Halloween order-by date: October 21, 2026. Orders placed later still ship, but we can't promise they'll arrive by Oct 31.